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How do I get him to stop without letting everyone at work know my business?

My ex has been at me for 2 years now as he works with me. I ended it because he was never around and he used to deal weed, which I did not like. I asked him to stop over and over again. Anyway, he told me just this week that he wants me back and he pleaded and said it was his fault we split and he was very angry and passionate about it. He could not give me an answer when I asked him "Why did you make it go wrong, was it that you needed other women? No answer, just that it was his fault he messed up. So one of my friends told me to ask him to introduce me to his sister whom he lives with and to see his room if he wants be back so badly (in the year we dated he never invited me up to his place, or I should say his sisters place).
So I did at lunch break and he got upset and said that it was not his place but his sister's and if we did go out on Saturday, I could come up but his sister wouldn't be there. He keeps hurting me at every turn and I still love him and keep wishing things would change and work out the way I want them to or the way they should be. How do I get him to stop without letting everyone at work know my business? I want to tell him to go %@$* himself, even when I know I could never do it.


Sophie's advice

Why is it that so many people seem to be willing to stay or get into situations that are clearly not good for them? What is the question here? Whether you should get back with someone who was never around, dealt weed, gets angry when he is apologizing, doesn't communicate, lives with his "sister" and keeps his home life a mystery? Or how you can get rid of him? If the first, I think you have your answer right there. If you are wondering how to let him know that it is over and that is the end of it, stop playing games with him. If you want to get rid of him, why even bother asking to see his place. Who cares? At this point you have helped make things so dramatic that your work may find out that you guys dated and that now he wants to you back. If so, who cares? Stop getting involved and promoting this drama. If you are not wanting to get back with him, let him know that and move on.

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