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What Am I Doing Wrong?

Hi I have been living alone for the past 15 years now and I am about to hit 50. I would love to find someone and believe me I have looked, unfortunately I am still alone. What I wrong with me? Why can't I find someone. Every where I look there are couples together, kissing or holding hands, I even see the elderly walking hand in hand. But as for myself I am still alone and begining to think I am going to die this way. I really wish someone would tell me what is wrong with me or what I am doing wrong? HELP!!!

Alone & Still Looking




Sophie's advice

Dear Still Looking;
It's difficult for someone who's never met you to tell you "what's wrong" with you. You say you have "looked" for a mate - does that mean you've tried all the options out there for you? There are so many these days, online dating, speed dating, match making services etc., as well as singles dances, joining clubs, having hobbies, getting set up through friends etc. Could it be that you're trying too hard, or not hard enough? Attitude is so much of it - do you know what kind of vibe you're giving off when you meet people? If it's one of desperation, or bitterness, I can guarantee you won't attract anyone that way. Have you worked on yourself? Are you happy with yourself? If you're not happy in your own company you can't expect anyone else to be, or to create your happiness for you.

Also keep in mind that in the world we live in today, appearance and first impressions can often play a role. I'm not saying you have to be model thin or anything of the kind, but how do you present yourself to the world? Do you take care of yourself physically, do you dress age appropriately? These are all things to consider, and it may be in your best interest to ask a friend or someone you really trust who knows you what their very honest opinion is concerning your attitude and the way you present yourself. Life has a way of letting you know you have things to take care of before you can get what you want so keep that in mind and really look inward for the answers if you can.

Mark's advice

Well hello there, alone and still looking.
I'm so glad we could spend this quality time together.
Just you and me, the stars, the cool night breezes.
Okay, I'm teasing you, aren't I.

Frankly my dear, I have no idea what you're doing wrong, because I know nothing about you, other than you're about to spend your 50th birthday watching the rest of the world go by without you. Maybe we should go through the lonely person checklist.

Are you making an effort to look good for that certain someone? (Brush your teeth, hair, and whatever else is out of place) Are you keeping a healthy weight? (Exercising, walking, dancing, breathing) Are you friendly and smile now and again? And most important, are you getting out there?

People are not going to break your door down in hopes of a date with you. You have to get out there and make it happen. Hook up with an internet dating service. Go to a night club or a dance playing 70's music. Hey, (Led Zeppelin is still cool). Go to the movies with a friend.

Find out where guys hangout: the local hardware store, automotive flee markets, Canadian Tire. (Here's a hint. Ask some guy you see at the store who you fancy, for some technical help. Guy's love to show how smart they are. I know I do). 50 ain't that old anymore. It used to be when my dad was 50 and dinosaurs still roamed the earth, but it's not anymore. There are plenty of 50 year olds looking for someone, maybe you.




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