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Why is the distance making me feel so terrible?

My man and I have been together for 3 years. We have lived together for 2. 4 months ago he took a job in VT and I stayed in MA. We knew it was for a year so it seemed like the right thing to do. I have been very depressed and anxious since he left feeling like the relationship was bound to fall apart. He is home now for 2 months and I was really counting on these feelings going away when he got home, but that hasnt happened yet (only been a week). It makes me worry that maybe I don't love him anymore, which is insane,
because he makes me feel just amazing sometimes. Why do I keep feeling so terrible?

Feeling Terrible...




Erin's advice

You are feeling terrible for one of two reasons. Either you're insecurities are able to finally come out now that you're apart, which is making you second guess your feelings towards him, or, now that he is gone, you're regaining your individuality and perhaps realizing the relationship is not what it was cracked up to be. It takes a very strong commitment and faith in one another to carry on a long distance relationship; it's certainly not for everyone. It can make you lonely, anxious and afraid because you're not physically there with each other to offer reassurance. Our advice would be to give it some time. Try not to worry about it too much, that will only make it worse. But do listen to your feelings and the answers will come naturally. Life is full of change, endings and beginnings and everything has a natural cycle. Don't fight what your heart is telling you, whatever that may be.




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